'Dear Baby...'

Dear Giovanni Reyes,

One day, when you are real and come into my life as a child that will need real food and real human care and attention, I promise I will care and love for you with all my heart. As you grow I will help you learn things about the world, and encourage you to try so many different things. So many kids hate so much because their parents didn't let them try anything new! And that is what I want to avoid!
It feels cruel to give you dreams and aspirations, because if I had to give you mine it would be to travel Italy and work for Ubisoft Entertainment... But this is not about me, it is about you, Giovanni. So, I'll support any dreams you have. Ill try as hard as I can to help keep them alive and healthy and thriving.
Always I promise to keep you safe. Keep you experienced in social hurt but not enough to scar you for life.
Having you will change my life. The missed gatherings with friends, being late for work constantly, changing seemingly endless diapers... But it will all be for the best. All be to help you grow and thrive under my and your father's love! It will be worth it because when you look back, even if you dont remember the feedings and burpings and diapers upon diapers... You'll be able to remember your mum and dad with love and joy!
I cant wait to meet you, my future little boy.

Love,
Mum

Giovanni`s Name

My child`s name is Giovanni Reyes. And, if he takes on his father's last name, Giovanni Reyes Fortune. Which, after some research, I have found to mean "God's fortunate King", which is a very powerful and interesting name.

Giovanni is an Italian name, which I have loved for many, many years. Having some ancestral ties to Italy (Sicily to be specific), I also find the name `Giovanni` to be almost a tribute to my Italian genes. However, `Giovanni` can have many meanings other than `God`.


Baby and Daddy!

Reyes, my baby`s middle name, also has many meanings. The ones I have come to fondness of are `protector` and `king`. Not many will know the meaning of his middle name, but I like having almost like a `protection charm` on my child. Or leadership.

So, as you can see lots of thought behind this name for my baby!! The reason why there is so much thought behind it is because one day I want a boy of my own. And this is a beautiful name I am very fond of for a male child.

Development of Giovanni

There are many cases I have of Giovanni`s development over his course of time with me, however I feel I like these examples best, and that you`ll enjoy these most!

Social Development and Cognitive Development. Here is a video of Giovanni and his father playing a game of `This Little Piggy`. It is a game used to help a baby or young child learn about their body (by wiggling toes) and help them make new social bonds. The child as he gets older may remember the `Little Piggy` game, and in turn may have a fond memory of somebody who played it with them often (I know I do of my Grandmother whenever I hear that rhyme!)




Motor Development Giovanni and I were sitting in the car, and I was feeding him until he cooed and told me no more! While I was finishing the drive (I was in the back seat), Giovanni wrapped his tiny fingers around my thumb!! So cute, and a fine example of learning how to grab, and build his strength!

Reflection of Day Three

(No Images for Day Three. I was not a 'happy camper' that day.)

I wrote this reflection in the middle of the night between day three and four;

`` I`ve really had enough. during the day is fine but at night, as soon as it hits 9:30pm, I can not take the caring for Giovanni anymore. No baby I`ve ever heard of needs an hour and a half long feeding. Being this young, I need my own sleep. Hours of it. Waking up to care for Giovanni constantly is my. waking. nightmare.
Being seperate from James still puts heavy stress on me though, of course, because we`re both so very close to each other. Not being able to lean on him for support is murder to me, especially right now, so late at night, and I can not even message him on my phone!``

I`m ready and willing to say that I`m not ready for a child. Even my desire for sexual intimacy has dwindled heavily. I do not want a child. Not yet, at least.
After handing baby Giovanni back to my teacher after my alloted baby time was over, I crawled all the way back home and feel sleep trying to claim me.

What happened on day three of having baby, was I was supposed to go to a party with my friends. Really just a small get together with people I have not seen in years, but the friend who organized this told me a few horus before it began ``nobody is going to show up, so we`ll just hang out next weekend, kay?`` I replied that it was okay, and I would see her next weekend. But an horu after the party started, another friend asked me `why are you not here yet? not coming to chill?`` My friend had uninvited my boyfriend and I because of baby Giovanni!! I was shocked, but can understand now how a child does affect your life in such ways.

I am ever-grateful for this experience: this chance to test myself for a real child. And while mentally I am totally unprepared, my final mark was only one neck mishandling, everything else was perfectly done! The misshandleing was at James` house on day one, around 9:30, but Im not complaining.

I do feel guilty for skipping a day of school, but having barely eaten or slept all weekend the day will be well-used. First I will nurse myself back to full health, then I will finish up some school work!

Reflection of Day Two

My sister and Giovanni's Aunt holding my baby.

Day Two was when I began to feel like a real teen parent. Baby Giovanni has helped me to understand already how much work a newborn truely is. However, I beleived at the time and still beleive even after the project was completed that I was an amazing Momma to G. Every single time he even made the smallest coo or breath I was on-edge and on alert, waiting to care for him.

I, by the end of Day two, did not see Giovanni as a fake baby used to collect marks in school any longer. I felt at that moment bonded to the baby, and since I one day would love for my own family, saw the fake child as a test for a one-day real baby.

However, being away from James brought my stress levels to bad heights. He is the only other person I would have trusted with my baby, to take him when G needed burping or feeding and I needed a break, and during day two I was unable to visit him. Caring for Giovanni alone and without somebody to give me a reassuring hug was exhausting.

What worsened the stress was that my sistser insisted she hold my baby when I strictly told her `no`. She would roll on an exersice ball all over the house and especially near Giovanni, which freaked me right out. After I made her put the ball away, all my sister did was make up foul nicknames for Giovanni, including `Voldie`, `Tootsiepop` and `Broski G`. They really annoyed me, and since I felt bonded to Giovanni, my sister`s shenanigans really made me furious.

Otherwise, I had barely any human interaction all of day two. I had no changes to anything or any help. However, Giovanni fed for an hour and a half during this night, and was awake almost all night.

Reflection of Day One

Baby and Momma!

Day one went fairly well. I got used to having the baby around, got used to having him in my life. My boyfriend, James, helped primarily care for him on this day, taking Giovanni while he needed burping or feeding.

Many family members on both James' side and mine were excited about having a child around for a while, before he cried constantly. They almost seemed amused at my suffering of having to wake up all the time. However, the best reaction I received was from a man who hassled me on the street. He believed I had a real baby and let me go without heckling me any longer. Another was when G began to cry in an elevator and made a woman jump in terror. She looked at me like pregnancy was contagious, with the dirtiest most scared look Ive ever seen on a human being's face.

During the night Giovanni slept well, settling around ten and waking around five in the morning. I was unused to waking up so very early, but toughed it out, as baby and I had to accompany my sister to a Dentist appointment.

Day Three.

6:35am - 9:36pm.

Super, super quiet all day. I fed G while the sun rose, which was pretty nice to watch and experience. Even better once the baby cooed and let me sleep for an enitre hour. Otherwise, as you can see from this time frame, Giovanni was terrifyingly quiet all day.

9:37pm - 7:29am

Baby Giovanni started to get active around ten at night when I was getting ready for bed and kept me awake needing contant care from four AM until seven AM where he was quiet until handing him over back to my instructor for the baby course.

This last night with him was like taking care of a little baby devil. If G was not crying or eating, he was fussily screaming at me. I think if this was a real baby, had I not had more sanity, baby would have been thrown. (And this is me being compltley honest).

All weekened, I barely ate, because I dont eat the frozen pre-prepared meals from the grocery store or anything from MacDonalds or anything that comes from a frozen cardboard box in general. So combining sleep deprivation with not eating for three days, you can see why I was incredibly grumpy.

I would place an entry for Day Four, however Giovanni (after crying all night) was worn out!! He slept quietly all the way to school, until Giovanni was handed over to a fellow classmate who then took her turn with him.

My final score- One misshandeling and zero missed cares. I'm an awesome mom (for this fake baby)!